Is it okay to let Kashmir become another Afghanistan? An open letter to Omar Abdullah, Mehbooba Mufti ji, Sakina Itoo ji and Iltija Mufti Ji

By: Nida Hafeez

Your Excellencies and Honorables

A young girl from Anantnag recently became the target of brutal online trolling — not for any crime or indecency, but for a simple, spontaneous public expression. At a public education event, she hugged a teacher she admired. That brief moment of human warmth was twisted into a social media spectacle that shamed, defamed and dehumanised her.

Some 15 years ago, a young Kashmiri girl sang the famous Yim kam korei.. sadde naal Kashmiri song at a wedding. It was the time when social media and smart phones had just come to our lives in Kashmir. Her singing video was mass circulated, she was named and shamed (admired by a few), which, finally, led her to commit suicide!

Coming back to Anantnag, within hours, the student’s video was everywhere. Men and women, many educated and seemingly sensible,  mocked her, moral-policed her and called her names on social media.  They dragged religion into it, labelling her “immodest,” “shameless,” and worse. And yet, none of them paused to reflect on what our faith actually teaches: that slander, backbiting and public humiliation are grave sins.

The Qur’an is clear on this: “Indeed, those who love to spread indecency among believing men and women will have a painful punishment in this world and the Hereafter.” (24:19)

The Prophet (peace be upon him) taught us to conceal the faults of others, not expose them. Those who claim to defend Islamic values by humiliating a young girl should remember that the sin of slander is far heavier than a hug.

Let us remember that the Final Prophet (peace be on him) came to this world at a time when many new-born girls were buried alive because the social norms then had made it difficult to bring up a girl child. Prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) restored girls’ and women’s social dignity, and made the practice of burying girls alive to end.

Amid the social uproar, unfortunately, we didn’t hear a single word of empathy or sympathy from anyone whose voice matters in Kashmir – neither the Chief Minister Omar sahab, Education Minister Sakina Itoo ji, former Chief Minister Mehbooba Mufti  ji or her rising daughter Iltija Mufti or other key pilitical voices like Ifra Jan.

To speak about something which is seen as “poltically incorrect” in Kashmir is understandable, but silence has a much greater cost – believe me it is getting very difficult to be a girl/woman in Kashmir due to male bullying.

The Anantnag act was not a private act caught in secrecy; it was a public education event, attended by teachers, parents  and students. It is understandable that certain acts in Kashmir today, like a public hug, are socially sensitive. Let us assume it was an innocent mistake. Yet the moral policing that followed revealed something deeply troubling about today’s Kashmiri  society.

For Kashmir’s male moral policemen there are far more important social evils to fight for: drug menace, late marriages, seeking earning brides for their marriages as a pre-condition, giving due inheritance rights to their sisters, not giving due dower to their wives and so on.

The tragedy is if we continue on this path of unchecked and unrestrained male moral policing for something not worth condemning, we risk turning Kashmir into another Afghanistan, where, we know, female voices have been  silenced and piety is measured by tribal traditions.

What happened to that girl is a legal offence. Circulating someone’s video without consent, attaching defamatory comments and inciting public harassment are all crimes under India’s IT Act and defamation laws.

It is commendable that the girl and her mother have decided to pursue legal action against those who uploaded and shamed her. This must become a precedent. J&K police and judiciary should set a strong example to deter others from misusing social media for humiliation. If the law fails her, it fails every Kashmiri woman.

The message must be clear: digital harassment is violence. Defamation is not free speech. And those who shame women in the name of religion will be held accountable.

Let us be honest — this outrage had nothing to do with faith. It had everything to do with fragile male egos that cannot tolerate women being seen, heard or expressive. Most of these same men do a lot of immoral things, scroll through indecent content in private while preaching “modesty” in public. Their hypocrisy is the real moral decay.

As a 23-year-old woman, I feel suffocated by the distortion of an act which was innocent and blown out of proportion. We all must fear a society where empathy is mocked and decency replaced by judgement.

Our judiciary must rise to this moment. Every man or media page that shames women online should face swift legal consequences. Parents, educators and religious leaders must speak against this growing culture of humiliation.

That does not mean we should impose a culture of blatant silence. Positive and healthy criticism is a bedrock of democratic societies. However, we must make a distinction between defamation and slander targeted at individuals and general criticism.

Because if we remain silent now, it won’t stop here. Tomorrow, another girl, your classmate, your sister, your daughter, may face the same mob, the same cruelty, the same trauma.

A chose Ziraat Times to publish this because this is the only newspaper I know which practises true independence, has a strict policy on slander/defamation, content moderation and is respected for that.

Kashmir must decide: do we want to live as a community of dignity, faith  and compassion, or descend into a society of fear and hate?

The writer is doing her masters in Mass Communications.